askfallencas:

watching yourself being replaced by people better than you

image

(Source: askfallencas-archive, via canadian-coitus)

If Harry Potter movies were titled by the clothes he wear…

thewords-sosweet:

-Harry Potter and My Hogwarts Uniform.

image

-Harry Potter and I defeated the Basilisk with my Hogwarts Uniformimage

-Harry Potter and I met my godfather with a blue shirtimage

-Harry Potter and The red shirt I wear all the movieimage

-Harry Potter and I wear that blue shirt againimage

-Harry Potter and I wear that blue shirt againimage

-Harry Potter and I changed the blue shirt for the red oneimage

-Harry potter and I will confront my fate with my old blue shirt.image

(Source: thenamelessstory, via tumbledore-)

awidesetvagina:

this is still the best story ever told at a talk show

(via best-time2wearastripedsweater)

thefunniestpost:

clelta:

We were talking about Shakespeare in English class and the tradition of throwing tomatoes when the actors are bad. Well it turns out, back then people thought tomatoes were poisonous, and so people would aim at the actors mouth and try to kILL THEM WHEN THEY WERE BAD AT ACTING OMG

(via best-time2wearastripedsweater)

i-like-pigeons:

vvendys:

all you need to pass school tbh

tru

i-like-pigeons:

vvendys:

all you need to pass school tbh

tru

(via best-time2wearastripedsweater)

meanplastic:

I THOUGH THIS WAS LANA DEL REY FOR 3.40000 SECONDS

meanplastic:

I THOUGH THIS WAS LANA DEL REY FOR 3.40000 SECONDS

(Source: weirdnessisgood, via vinnno)

dicksplit:

*Baby starts crying on a plane*

image

(via the-absolute-funniest-posts)

du4ne:

some of y’all look so good but have really off-putting personalities so my self-esteem remains intact

benedictatorship:

fabferre:

assflute:

so our class is reading romeo and juliet
and i stumble across this gem

image

did shakespeare really just make a dick joke

Um, I hate to break it to you, sweetheart, but all Shakespeare does is make dick jokes.

also vagina jokes

'Nothing' is Elizabethan slang for vagina

He actually wrote a play called Much Ado About Nothing 

Translation: A Lot of Fuss About Vaginas

SHAKESPEARE WROTE A FUCKTON OF DIRTY JOKES IN HIS PLAYS 

(Source: marcobae, via best-time2wearastripedsweater)

Anonymous said: What's so bad about periods

mistyslay:

  • Blood comes out of your vagina for anywhere from 3-7 days
  • That blood you lose can be around 4 tablespoons to a cup
  • a cup of blood, vaginal mucus, and endometrial tissue
  • You get cramps that will make you cry. You can vomit and/or pass out from them
  • You will get horrible mood swings
  • You get headaches
  • Backaches
  • Your breasts hurt so bad sometimes you can’t even touch them
  • You get acne everywhere
  • Your actual vagina could be sore
  • Your feel constantly tired
  • You have a constant fear of soaking through your pad/tampon
  • You can’t lay a certain way in bed
  • You take pill after pill and it still doesn’t help
  • You bloat and gain weight
  • You might have anemia (iron deficiency) which can not clot your blood causing so much blood loss it’ll be deadly
  • You never feel full
  • Everything irritates you
  • You will cry a lot
  • Once you get up in the morning, your center of gravity has shifted and all the blood settling in you during the night will now rush out of you causing you to clench your legs tightly to avoid leaking
  • You get made fun of for having a period ?////?/?/
  • You’re forced to go to school/work
  • You get told that you’re overreacting

but ya know, fixing your dick discreetly in public is bad too

preach

pussylover3000:

IM LOGGING OFF

pussylover3000:

IM LOGGING OFF

(via llttlemermaid)

cumsock:

phukers:

I’m going to nickname my child lil Bitch 

i see you’re passing on the family name

(via the-republic-of-jew)

"Too many young girls don’t know how to act when someone’s being inappropriate with them. They giggle or they try to brush it off. Don’t do that. Tell them to go fuck themselves - be a bitch. If someone’s being disrespectful to you, be disrespectful right back. Show them the same amount of respect that they show you."

— Wise words from my mom (via hachikuji)

(Source: smallfreelancer, via canadian-coitus)

the-fake-commander-shepard:

My parents are lucky I was too lazy to go through a rebellious phase

(Source: shepardism, via canadian-coitus)